


Stay and Smile As Dreaming

by pandorabox82



Category: Star Trek: The Next Generation
Genre: 12 Days of Ficmas, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-27
Updated: 2021-01-27
Packaged: 2021-03-13 05:22:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,564
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29023425
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pandorabox82/pseuds/pandorabox82
Summary: Lwaxana didn't know how their argument got so big as to lead to Kate leaving for Earth, saying she needed space. But she did know that she had to head to her home in order to make things right for the holiday season.
Relationships: Katherine Pulaski/Lwaxana Troi
Comments: 2
Kudos: 5





	Stay and Smile As Dreaming

Lwaxana sighed as she looked out the window, trying to go over the words that she wanted to say once more. They had sounded perfectly all right in her head before she had left Betazed, but now that she was fast approaching Earth and hoping to see Kate once more, the words seemed to be turning to ash and rust in her mind. A good stiff breeze might end up blowing them away, leaving her speechless at a time she could ill afford to have no words.

Her door chimed, and Lwaxana tore her gaze away from the window before speaking. "Enter!"

The door opened, revealing a nervous looking ensign. "The shuttle is ready for you, Madame Ambassador. If you would follow me." She nodded as she elegantly rose to her feet, drawing in a deep breath as followed the young woman down to the shuttle bays of the ship. "Are you heading down to Earth for a reason? Or are you on official business?"

"I have a reason, but that is none of your business, Ensign."

"Yes, ma'am."

Lwaxana hated to be so sharp with anyone, but she didn't feel like explaining why she had elbowed her way onto a good number of ships heading in the general direction of her heart's home. She had screwed up, had destroyed something good and precious to her because of her petty jealousy and over the top flirting as a result. And now, she was hoping that the one person in the world who truly understood her, besides Odo, who was now residing in the Great Link according to Kira Nerys, would understand that it was the old Terran season for love and forgiveness, and think about forgiving her. Shaking her head a little to clear away the maudlin thoughts, she allowed the young ensign to gently take hold of her arm and guide her into the shuttle before taking a seat next to her. "You're coming down to Earth, too?" she asked, trying to make amends with the second person she'd hurt that holiday season.

"Yeah, my parents haven't seen me in three years, since we've been out in deep space on a research mission, and I thought that I'd surprise them for Christmas. We've kept to the old traditions, and I have the feeling that it will be a white Christmas, which will be lovely. I haven't seen proper snow since I started on this ship. Are you getting off the shuttle in San Francisco or continuing on to Alaska?"

"My final destination is Ketchikan, Alaska."

The ensign gave her a pleased smile, and then sighed a little. "That's perfect! We'll be together to the very end! I'm so glad that I'll get to escort you to your destination! I promise, I'll try not to be over excited, but it going to be so hard, since I love this time of year so much, and I can't wait to be with my family again."

Lwaxana blinked back tears as she nodded. "My daughter and her husband are travelling this year, so I won't see them for a while. They've decided to settle down on Nepenthe, but Jean Luc calls and they must answer."

"Jean Luc Picard?" She nodded again. "That's incredible! I would love to have the opportunity to meet him one day. Do you know him?"

"I do. And he is a very kind man. I'm certain that you'll achieve your dream one day." Feeling emboldened, Lwaxana reached out and patted her leg softly, taking care not to read her thoughts. That was one thing that Kate had taught her, to be more circumspect with her talent, since it wasn't fair that she knew everything about almost anyone in mere moments. "And I'm sorry for snapping at you earlier. This is not the pleasant holiday that I had been wishing for."

"I'm sorry. Christmas is a time to be happy, not to have a heavy burden on your heart. And I know, you probably don't want to talk to a young, flighty, ensign, but I have been told that I have a good ear. And since we have about three hours, you could maybe get a lot of whatever's bothering you out before you reach your destination?"

Lwaxana gave her a placid smile as she shook her head. "It's lovely of you to offer, but I think that I just want to spend the time reading. I'm sorry to be a boring travel companion."

"It's perfectly okay," the ensign replied, giving her a sweet smile. "If you change your mind, though, I'm right here."

Lwaxana nodded as she pulled out her padd and began to read the last book that Kate had told her she'd been reading. It was another way to feel closer with her partner, even when they were far apart. She didn't realise that she was crying while she read until the ensign handed over a delicate cloth handkerchief, and Lwaxana smiled when she tripped through the woman's mind to see that it was indeed an antique, having belonged to an ancestor many generations removed. "Thank you," she murmured as she swiped at her cheeks, hoping that her makeup hadn't smudged. There wouldn't be time to fix it before she arrived at Kate's door, and she let out a deep sigh as she settled back in her seat, shivering a little at the change in temperature.

"Do you want a blanket? There should be a few in storage, and you're not really dressed for the weather we're likely to encounter once we get to Ketchikan."

"That would be nice," she replied absently as she curled up in her seat, turning towards the wall as she closed her eyes and thought about how she would handle seeing Kate again. Her partner had said to give her time, to allow her to process her emotions, and Lwaxana had given her that, or at least as long as she could bear. Which had amounted to two months. Two long, difficult, months where she had held onto her son and tried to be as positive and upbeat as possible when he had questioned where Mama Kate had gone. Finally, though, she had told Mister Homm that she had to follow after her love, and asked him to watch over her son. Which had led to this moment.

Moments later, she felt a warmth drop around her, and she reached up to pull the corners of the blanket tightly around her shoulders as she tried not to drift off to sleep. She didn't want to wake up foggy or have to fix her face when she woke up, after all. "So, what were you reading?"

"One of Kate's favorite books. It's hard to get into, because I'm not familiar with all things Terran, but I'm going to finish it for her."

"Because you love her." She nodded as she turned to look at the ensign. "You know, I don't think I ever told you my name. It's Emily Saltzburg." She gave Lwaxana another sweet smile and shrugged a little. "I've watched some of your debates with Mister Garak, and I've enjoyed them so much. You two seem made to spar with each other, but I can tell that you both respect each other a lot. There are some ambassadors who don't have that same level of respect." That seemed like a safe enough topic to talk about, and Lwaxana smiled a little as she allowed Emily to pull her into a conversation that kept her mind off Kate and their upcoming conversation.

Three hours later, they arrived in Ketchikan, and Lwaxana folded the blanket and set in on the seat before following Emily out into the terminal. "This is where we part ways. I hope that you enjoy your holiday, Emily."

"And I hope that you find the answers that you seek, Ambassador Troi." Lwaxana felt a warm wave of affection from Emily's mind, and then the younger woman was giving her a quick hug before slipping by her, waving to a man and woman as she jogged over to their sides. A forlorn sigh slipped from Lwaxana's mouth as she picked up the small bag she had packed and took one last look at her padd to determine the way that she would have to go from the shuttle, and then stepped out into the freezing cold air of Alaska in December. Emily was correct, she was not prepared for this weather, and she shivered a little as she made her way down the street. The longer she walked, the colder she became, until her teeth were chattering loudly in her mouth when she finally turned onto Kate's street.

The lights were on in her home when she arrived outside the beautiful house, and she smiled as she turned down the walk and approached the door. As she raised her hand to knock on the door, it suddenly opened, revealing her partner. "I hope that I gave you enough time?" she asked, all her pretty words suddenly vanishing once more as she looked away from Kate's face, not wanting to see the rejection that she was certain to be there.

"Get in here," Kate said gruffly as she opened the door a little wider, and Lwaxana nodded meekly as she rushed past Kate and dropped her bag on the floor as she waited for further instruction. "You really hurt me."

"I know that now. I'm sorry. I've missed you, and I kept trying to find the words to say that could start to make amends. All I know is that I missed you, and I screwed up. And all I can do is ask you to forgive me and come home to me. To us. Ian asks where his Mama Kate is, and I know that that will sound like I'm trying to guilt you into doing something you might not want, and I don't know what else I can do." Lwaxana burst into tears as she brought her hands up to her face, not wanting Kate to see her sorrow. That was why she missed Kate moving closer to her before she was drawn into a warm embrace. And even though she knew that she shouldn't, Lwaxana peeked into her mind, just a little, to get a feel for the emotion that she was experiencing. It was a miasma of love and hurt and longing, which was enough to fully open the waterworks and she sobbed into the crook of her partner's shoulder, allowing Kate to guide her through the home until they were sitting down on a sofa of some sort. Glancing around, Lwaxana found that they were in the living room, and she smiled at the small Christmas tree on the table by the window.

"I can't believe that this was the first time that you listened to me, Lew."

"You said that you needed space and time. I gave you as much of that as I could before my heart couldn't take it any longer. I know that you were so hurt by the way I was flirting with the other ambassadors, as if I didn't truly love you. As if I was looking to be unfaithful." She couldn't look at Kate's face, but she did welcome her lover clasping her hands, holding on tightly, as if they were a lifeline that bound them together. "I just felt safe enough with where we were in order to be myself again. The occupation took so much out of me, and you rebuilt me heart. How could I ever betray you? And yet, you felt like I had, and I am just so sorry."

"You're not supposed to cry, Lew. Not like this."

She shook her head before pressing her lips against Kate's neck, sighing at the feel of here skin once more. "I have cried like this more times than I can count since you left. Because I knew that I had very nearly broken something so precious to me. Do you think that we can still make this work? Please?"

There was a soft pause, and it took all her willpower to not rummage through Kate's mind to find the answer to her question. "Yes. My answer will always be yes, Lew. Having you show up on my doorstep on Christmas Eve, wearing clothes that are more appropriate for Risa than Alaska, just cements that you're the only one crazy enough to put up with my acerbic ways. I should have written to you, called, something, to tell you that I missed you. Where's little Ian?"

"Home. I, I didn't want to take the risk that you might reject me, as is your right, and have to explain to him that you would no longer be a part of our lives. I, I could call and have Mister Homm arrange to bring him here, but he most likely wouldn't arrive before the Terran New Year."

"That would actually be perfect, since that would give us time to make up." The husky tone of Kate's voice told Lwaxana just what sort of making up Kate wanted to indulge in. A faint blush stole across her cheeks as she tried to think innocent thoughts, only for Kate to laugh before gently pushing her away so that she could cup her face with her hands. "That is the best part of making amends, learning to come back together and cherish the time that we have."

"May I kiss you, then?"

"I wish that you would." Lwaxana gave her Kate a tremulous smile as she leaned in and pressed her lips against her lover's, drinking in the taste that was purely Katherine Pulaski. What started out tender and hesitant soon deepened as she felt Kate's desire mingle with hers in a swirl of thought, and she smiled as she pressed her lover back against the sofa as her free hand slipped beneath the sweater she was wearing in order to brush against her breasts, chuckling against Kate's lips when she found that she wasn't wearing a bra and thus she was able to tease and tug at a nipple, feeling Kate mewl and moan against her lips before her lover was pushing her off, her breathing heavy as she stared up into Lwaxana's eyes. "We can't do this here. Follow me?"

"That's exactly what I did, Kate. And what I'll do for as long as you allow me. I'll even take up residence here, if that's what you want."

"You could never leave your home, Lwaxana, and I would never ask that of you. But we'll talk about the future in a few days. Tomorrow is Christmas, and all I want is to wake up in your arms, make love a few times, and cook together."

"Real cooking?"

"Of course." Lwaxana nodded as she gave Kate a full smile. Holding out her hand, she sighed as Kate helped her to her feet and together, they made their way up the stairs to Kate's bedroom. There was going to be time enough to talk after their reunion, but now that she knew things were going to be all right, Lwaxana could give herself over fully to the pleasure that she knew would come in the arms of her lover. Her dreams that evening would be full of smiles, since Kate had asked her to stay.


End file.
